Ukippers looking forward to destroying UKIP

Ukip voters across Britain are counting the days until they can vote for their party to be cast into the political void.

Ukip supporter Richard Smith “can’t wait” until June 23rd, when he’ll be voting for Britain to leave the EU and for Ukip to be reduced to Lib Dem-levels of support.

Asked whether he thought that Brexit would make the anti-EU party irrelevant, Richard admitted it might, but suggested that this could be a good thing: “we British have always favoured the underdog.”

Meanwhile, Ukipper Emma Harding has toyed with the idea of supporting her party by voting to remain, but is leaning towards Leave.

Asked whether she was concerned with immigration, she replied that she had a more important worry:

“The Romanians I’ve met have been polite, hardworking, and appreciative of the opportunities Britain has afforded them.

“I’m more worried about the Remainians… they’re always bashing Britain, saying that the EU is rubbish, but we’d be even more rubbish without it.

Emma had a novel answer to the problem:

“I’m backing Brexit with the suggestion that Michael Gove sends the Remainians to Romania and we can keep the Romanians.

“Alternatively, the Remainians could be redistributed across Europe as part of a unified European response to the Remainian Crisis. There they could remain to their heart’s content.

“If we can agree on this scheme with the EU then we won’t even need the permission of EU member states.

“On second thoughts, I might not vote for Leave…”